Death's Lonely Past (Until Love Came Along)
by Muse of Fanfiction
Summary: Harbouring concern for her dear lover, Macaria seeks out the story behind the loneliness of Thanatos' past. (MacariaXThanatos)
1. Chapter 1

_**Sadness**_

One night, Macaria and Thanatos surfaced to the Aboveworld upon duties as the deities of Death. The land was frozen over as fluffs of snow fell from the sky to the already snow-laden ground, and both the god and goddess could feel their skins being bitten by the icy cold air as they made their way to the home of their subjected deceased.

They found the soul of the elderly man lingering in his small house on the outskirts of a village, sitting at the foot of his bed as he stared at the ashes that littered the hearth nearby. By how cold and desolate the inside of the house was, it clearly gave the indication that it had been quite some time since a fire had burned in the hearth of this humble home to provide warmth for someone who had been alive.

But even if the soul had been alive to occupy this house a few months back or so, Macaria could not ignore the vibe of loneliness that the abode gave off. It was obvious from the interior that the man had been the only one to live here, and it may also give away the fact that he had been the only one for a _very _long time.

"I thought nobody would come for me," the man's soul suddenly said quietly, his gaze sliding over to the two deities that stood nearby. "The both of you had taken a while."

With an apologetic bow of his head, Thanatos said, "There had been issues with your passing. You had not been given a proper funeral as soon as your thread of life had been cut."

It was true, what Thanatos had said. The man had truly been dead for quite a few days now, having passed away in his sleep at a ripe old age. But because he had continued to lie on his bed instead of lying in the earth soon after his thread has been cut by the Fates, his soul had managed to move out of his body and wander around his home, the place that he was very bonded to. Melinoe, who had been roaming the Aboveworld with her retinue of ghosts behind her, had chanced upon his spirit and his rotting corpse when she was passing by the village earlier in the night. She immediately took action by commanding one of her ghostly followers to possess a person to inform the temple officials of the old man's body, before she rushed down to the Underworld to inform her older sister and Thanatos. It was only now did the deities of Death were aware of the old man's passing.

The old man's soul heaved a saddened sigh. "It is no surprise that this is how my life ends," he murmured quietly under his breath. "By myself, in my isolated and empty home. No one there by my side, and no one there to mourn me as I took my last breath. Alone from the beginning, and alone to the end."

"Do you have no next of kin?" Macaria asked him politely.

At her question, more pain set into the soul's lifeless eyes as he sighed again and shook his head. "I do not have a next of kin for I have never wed, goddess. What woman would want to be my bride when I had killed my own mother as she suffered to bring me into this world?"

A thoughtful look took over Thanatos' pale features as he asked, "Is that why you are alone?"

The old man did not hesitate to nod his head in agreement, although it was clear that the thought of it pained him immensely.

"My father hated me for killing his wife. My siblings hated me for killing their mother. The villagers saw me as a curse to take away the life of an honest and good woman. Maybe it was my destiny to stay alone and be unloved, for this might be a punishment for taking away the life of the one person who suffered so much to bring me to life. I had brought death upon my poor mother."

Macaria could not help but be saddened to hear the old man's tale, and she could feel her heart breaking and tears forming at the corner of her eyes. It was such a depressing story of this mortal's life, and she knew very well that he did not actually deserve it. He had only been an innocent soul who did not mean to cause his mother to die during his birth. She knew and understood very well that it was never his intention to do so, and she felt internally angry at how all the people in the old man's life has been cruel to him by ignorantly thinking that he was a murderer.

But just then, her attentions moved onto Thanatos. Her partner moved towards the soul and knelt down in front of him, taking his hands in his and holding it in a gentle grasp. The old man looked up from the ground at him, looking genuinely confused as to what the God of Death was about to do to him.

There was clear sadness and pity in Thanatos' pale grey eyes as he gazed into the lifeless eyes of the soul, and there was tenderness in his movements as he brought one pale hand up to cup the soul's cheek affectionately – despite the fact that the old man was a soul, Thantos, being a deity of Death, had the power to touch him.

At the side, Macaria was stunned by the unexpected happenings. She was stunned because never before in all the times that she had been working with Thanatos had she ever seen him act in such a way. Never in the time that she had been with him had she ever experience him being so delicate with a soul. Usually, he would be aloof and neutral upon acting on his duties, not even coming into physical contact with the souls unless he needed to by force. But this was the first time he had ever been somewhat affectionate with one, especially when the comfort he was offering was actually genuine and truthful.

"Dear soul, let your pain go for you have finally left your past behind," Thanatos murmured to him gently in a soothing manner. "Your afterlife awaits you. You can forget about all the sorrows that had lingered in your heart when you had lived and breathed. There is no need to wallow and suffer more, because you will never have to face such cruelty again."

He then grasped both the old man's hands once again and urged him to stand up, signifying that he was now about to finally take him to the Underworld for his judgement. The old man followed him willingly, still holding onto Thanatos' hands, as though finding comfort in his grasp.

Thanatos did not pay mind to Macaria as he led the soul out of his former home, but she too stayed quiet in respect for him.

XXX

Macaria found Thanatos in the Elysian Fields, standing atop a cliff and watching the old man with a focused gaze. He only cast a brief glance to her when she came to stand by his side, before looking back to the old man. He did not catch the look of concern that was clear in her bright orange eyes, not noticing the way her thoughts were heavy on her mind.

"I have never seen you like that before," she remarked. "It was like a new part of you had just been revealed to me."

Macaria was genuinely surprised to see her lover act in a way he had never done so before, so she was curious as to what had prompted him to do so. Moreover, she wanted to know what was the reason for the sadness in his eyes at that moment.

"I pitied him, my dear," Thanatos told her softly. "It saddens me to see someone suffer so much from being alone, and it is very heart-breaking to see that they have never found happiness in their life. Wanting love but still remaining unloved. Yearning for company but never having anyone. Loneliness indeed does such pains to a delicate heart."

"You speak of it as though you know how it feels," she pointed out. True to her words, Thanatos had spoken with so much depth in her words, especially the look of understanding and recollection that appeared in his eyes as he did.

"Maybe because I do."

And that made Macaria become shock to her core at what she was hearing. _Thanatos? An unloved and lonely soul? s_he wondered.

It was then Thanatos finally turned to gaze right at her bright soft orange eyes, looking at her with melancholic sadness clear in his pale grey eyes. "You must understand, sweet Macaria, that I was not a very well-loved being most of the time," he told her truthfully. "From young, I had always been despised by many, and being loved was a blessing that I did not have."

"Surely that is not true," she stated defensively, frowning in disagreement.

He released a soft sigh and shook his head in response. "No, it is very much true. If I did have love from others who were willing to stay by my side, it was only my mother and my twin brother. Aside from Nyx and Hypnos, nobody else would hold love for me or want to be with me. You are the first in many centuries, I must admit to you truthfully."

Macaria became even more ridden in disbelief, unable to fathom thought of Thanatos – her kind and caring Thanatos – being unloved and alone. Surely that could not be true. A person as good-hearted as he was would surely have garnered the love and affections of many before her. The thought of him not having the love of others was almost implausible, and it just simply does not suit.

"Why wouldn't anyone want to be with you?" she questioned him sadly. She did truly want to know what might be the reason that her dearest had to have faced such loneliness, heart heavy at the thought of how much it must have pained him.

It did not take long for Thanatos to answer with another heave of a melancholic sigh.

"They saw me as nothing but Death."

Afterwards, he said nothing more regarding the matter, only turning to her and offering her his hand, telling her that it was time that he brought her back to her family for he also had some duties to attend to. Despite not being satisfied with how he could just drop the subject like that, Macaria took his hand without hesitation and led her lead her back out of the Fields and into the palace, where he placed a chaste but loving kiss on her lips before moving off.

But in silent thought, she could not shake off the thought of what her lover had just revealed to her.

* * *

**Author's Note **:

This is a special fanfic that I had written for my wonderful reader, **Brimo**! It was actually supposed to be a Christmas present, but circumstances have caused me to push this to AAALLLLL THE WAAAAY to now... So sorry Brimo if I had kept you waiting for way too long! I had no intention to do so :(

But anyway, this might be considered my first M-rated story, because there will be sexual references, and actual sex in the end. However! It would start out soft-core with mentions of sex in some of the first six chapters (some chapters would actually be T-rated, to be honest...), but it's the final chapter that's really SEX. I really thought as putting this as a T-rating, but I am paranoid of being reported by some snitches. (Trust me, it happened to me _twice_)

SO! This is my first official ThanatosXMacaria story! This would take place after the one-shot _Love Transcends Death _and it would be about Macaria seeking out the story of Thanatos' lonely past. In this first chapter, an encounter with a soul has Macaria discovering a part of Thanatos that she knew nothing about, and she's determined to find out how terrible it had been for her lover. As for the soul, the reason why he's outcasted was because his mother died while giving birth to him. In some cultures during ancient times, when a woman dies during childbirth but should her child survive, the child is seen as cursed for 'killing' her and would face discrimination throughout their entire life. Thus, due to being outcasted by his peers, the soul dies lonely and sad, which ignites Thanatos' pity.

Since this is a short fanfic, I will update this as and when the time is suitable, so there is no real specific days. However, I can promise you that it would be updated quite frequently, so look out for the next chapter if you're interested!

_Muse of Fanfiction_


	2. Chapter 2

_**Concern**_

"Macaria, dear? Are you alright?"

Macaria's blank gaze on her untouched plate of food was torn away when her father spoke to her. Looking up, she noticed that it was not only her father's attentions that were on her, but her mother, sister and brother's as well. Her parents were looking at her with concern clear in their eyes, while her siblings looked at her curiously.

"Your eyes show that there is something that is bothering you," Persephone pointed out knowingly. "What is wrong, my darling?"

Pointlessly pushing around the food on her plate with her fork, Macaria replied blankly, "It is not something of importance, Mother." But of course, the tone of her voice as she said that gave way that the matter was otherwise. "I just have some thoughts that weigh heavily on my mind. But there is no need worry over me, I assure you."

Hades and Persephone exchanged a knowing look between themselves. It was all too clear to them that the thoughts that were heavy on Macaria's mind were nothing but of Thanatos, for what had she to care about other than herself and her family; her family was fine, and the look in her eyes were meant for someone else other than her, so it could only be lover that she was thinking about.

As her parents, both Hades and Persephone wanted to help their daughter with whatever qualm she was facing with Thanatos. Seeing their precious oldest child hitting the first bumps of a relationship would want them to give her their care and support to help her go through it. However, it was the fact that what Macaria has with Thanatos was her private matters that was holding them back. They respected their daughter's privacy and they did not want to pry too much on her love life – it took a greater amount of will for Hades to do so, because although he fully trusted Thanatos, he was still very protective of his daughter – for they knew she was a mature young woman who was able to be responsible for her own actions.

So with a comforting smile, Persephone told her daughter, "If there is anything that we can help you with, dear flower, you know very well that you can come to us for guidance."

"Anything at all, my dear," Hades added gently in reassurance.

Touched by her loving parents' care and concern, Macaria looked up at both of them and smiled as she thanked them graciously, also assuring them that she will go to them if ever she needed.

But still, the thoughts of Thanatos continue to bother her from deep inside.

XXX

Three knocks sounded upon her door, and Macaria, without pausing in her task of brushing her long hair, answered, "Come in."

The door opened gently, followed by Melinoe and Zagreus entering her room.

"Sister, are you feeling alright now?" Zagreus asked in sincere concern, which made Macaria smile, touched at her younger brother's care.

"I'm alright, Zagreus. Thank you for asking," she replied reassuringly, putting down her hairbrush and turning in her seat to properly look at her younger siblings. "So what are you two here for? Anything I can help you with?"

Melinoe plopped herself down on the edge of her older sister's bed and leaned back as she replied, "No, but there is something that _we _wish to help you with."

Hearing that made Macaria cock an eyebrow in curiosity. "And what is that?" she questioned.

Rubbing his arm in uncertainty, Zagreus added, "About you and Thanatos, to be honest. We noticed how distracted and bothered you were during dinner, and we guessed that it must be something about him."

At that, Macaria suddenly recalled what had been bothering her; it came back to her in a flash for she had still been thinking about when she was still by herself just a few minutes ago. As the thought of Thanatos and his loneliness came back to the forefront of her mind, she could not repress a pitiful sigh.

"And that just proves that we were right," Melinoe pointed out knowingly, but then asked politely, "So will you tell us, if you wish to? We want to hear what happen to know what bothers you. Only then can we try to help."

Macaria actually did not hesitate to tell her siblings about the new concerns she had for her lover, since their closeness in familial bond and strong trust in each other ruled out any hesitance in telling them about it.

As she sat on her bed with her sister and brother, she explained to the both of them about what happened on the Aboveworld at the home of the old man, about Thanatos' unexpected and surprising interaction with the sad soul, even going into full detail of the tenderness he showed to the soul to ease away the thoughts of painful loneliness. She then went on to tell them about what her lover had told her in the Elysian Fields, which somewhat revealed a part of his past that she had no knowledge about until this day.

"So it bothers you that he used to be lonely?" Zagreus questioned, looking at her thoughtfully with his coal black eyes.

"He's not lonely now," Melinoe remarked. "He has you."

Sighing, Macaria then explained, "It's not just the pity that he was lonely. I want to know why he was lonely in the first place. There is sadness that still lingers in his past; a trait that I, his bonded, had known nothing about until the subject was unintentionally brought up today. To think that he was outcasted in the past just because he was Death is shocking, and I want to know what had happened to him back then."

"So why not you just ask him?" Melinoe questioned.

Recalling how upset her lover had been regarding the topic, and how it looked as though just talking about it would pain him immensely, Macaria let out another sigh and shook her head in response.

"He does not look like he wishes to talk about it, and I don't want to push him to talk about something he does not wish to recall, so I would not do that," she told them. "However, I really do want to find out about everything, and maybe from someone who would know as much as him."

Silence came between the three siblings, with the older sister being the most silent of them as she became too immersed in the wonderings of her lover and his sad past. It made Macaria feel guilt to realize that, despite how long she had been involved with Thanatos, she had yet to learn about his past. She did not want to seem so snoopy, but she really wanted to learn about his background so that, maybe, she could understand him better. She decided that the best idea then was to ask someone who would have known very well about Thanatos' loneliness and how he had been like during that period of his life, for she figured to herself that maybe hearing another's explanation can help her understand better

But then, Zagreus broke the silence, telling her helpfully, "Maybe you can ask about it from his twin brother, Hypnos."

* * *

"The goddess who had been with you… Is she your lover? Might I ask?"

Thanatos did not look away from the vast and open lake in front of him as he replied to the old man's question, "Yes, she is."

"I had a feeling," the old man remarked knowingly as he nodded in understanding. "I could tell from the way she looks at you. A concern of a lover in those kind orange eyes of hers. It is very clear that she really does care for you, minister of the Underworld."

Thanatos felt his lips lift into a small smile – barely visible, but still there. He did feel somewhat light-hearted at the thought of his lovely Macaria, and could not deny the truth that she really does care for him; something that not really a lot of people did. As such, he cared for her in the same way.

"How long have you been in love with her?" the old man asked curiously, his aged eyes finally looking to the god beside him.

"From the very moment I first laid eyes on her and from the very moment she first looked at me," Thanatos answered admittedly. "Since I first laid eyes on her, I felt something for her that I have never felt for anyone before, for no one would have given me that feeling of love in return. Only she did."

"How much do you love her?"

That was such a very vague question, for Thanatos could answer it in so many ways than one.

Of course, without a doubt, he loved the young goddess with all of his heart. Ever since she was a babe, she had managed to capture his affections while also returning her own. She was always smiling whenever she saw him, and she would give him her utmost attentions when she was in his company. Unlike other children her age, she had never shown once that she had been scared of him, and she had always looked at him as though he was the most beautiful creature ever created instead of Death. It made him touched that she would be this way to him, and it made him start to love her.

And as she grew older, those affections grew into more deeper and more sincere feelings for each other, and the love he had for her had finally come to the point where he had finally fallen _in_ love with her. She had been so kind and loving to him so very much that the thought of him ever being unloved in his life finally seemed impossible. She had given the companionship that he had used to never be blessed to have, and it only made him love her more for that.

But not only did he love her with his heart, but also with his body.

He loved Macaria to the point where he really desired for her body. He would not deny the fact that he was often enticed by her perfect womanly assets, for she was absolutely beautiful. She had the most softest and gentle of curves that he wished he could shape with his hands. She had soft and full breasts that he wished he could grasp and kiss for he wished to feel her soft and creamy flesh upon his touch. And with the treasure that was in between her legs, he wished that he could drink her sweet nectar, wanting to get drunk off the taste of her.

But the way he lusted for her body was not whereby he wished to claim her as his. Instead, he desired for _her _to claim him, wanting her to be the one to take away his chastity and make him hers, bonded through the sacred act of love-filled consummation.

He wanted it to be that way for he wanted to show Macaria how much he was willing to be hers, because she had been so willing to be his.

"So much," Thanatos replied, sighing wistfully. "So much that I want to give all of myself to her."

* * *

Macaria was sitting in Charon's ferry, being the only passenger he had at this very moment. She had her back to him, looking out at the expanse of the river Styx, while he ferried from the back, the both of them not facing each other. There was a silence that was hanging between them. It was not an awkward silence, but a companionable and comfortable one that need not be broken just for the sake of it.

In this silence, Charon wondered to himself about Macaria's intention to go to the poppy-filled cave of Hypnos. Never before has there been a need for him, nor any of the residents of the Underworld mainland, to go to the God of Sleep's cave, so the ferryman was genuinely curious as to why the princess had decided to venture there.

Something to do with the Sleep God's brother – her lover – perhaps?


	3. Chapter 3

_**Reminiscence**_

Before long, Charon had already crossed the invisible borders between Styx and Lethe, ferrying his boat into the latter river. He gently advised the princess to stay right at the middle of the ferry and do not go anywhere near the waters, for risk of losing memories if she did. Macaria did as she was told and huddled to herself in the middle, only keeping a wary eye on the mystical but lethal forgetting waters of the river Lethe.

Just then, the ferry had reached upon a cave nearby, where part of Lethe flowed through. It would have looked any other cave that could be found here and there in the Underworld, if it wasn't for the fact that this particular cave had a whole garden full of white poppies surrounding the entrance, which added color to the dark cavernous walls of the underground kingdom.

Because poppies were the sacred flower of Hypnos, it was obvious that this cave was his.

Speaking of which, the God of Sleep himself then emerged from the cave, just as Charon had docked the ferry and helped Macaria step off. She dismissed the ferryman then, telling him to come back in a while to pick her up, and he bowed respectfully before going off to continue his duties.

When Macaria turned to Hypnos, he was smiling kindly at her, and she couldn't help but be awed by the fact that, despite him and Thanatos being identical twin brothers, he could still look so vastly different. While Thanatos had ash-white hair and ashy-grey eyes – colors seemingly suitable for his role as the God of Death – and he always looked so very neutral and very often masked his feelings, Hypnos had black-streaked bluish-purple hair and taupe grey eyes – sleep-inducing colors befitting for his role as the God of Sleep – and he always looked so very at ease and would often be seen smiling languidly. Despite their identical faces, the difference in Thanatos and Hypnos could clearly be seen.

"My lady Macaria," Hypnos greeted respectfully with a bow. "What brings you here to my abode? Has your grace some sort of task you wish to bestow me?"

Bowing her head in returned respect, Macaria answered, "No, good Hypnos. I have actually come here to you today to speak to you about Thanatos."

Hypnos' eyes widened in surprise and his eyebrows rose to almost touching his hairline. "My brother?" he said in confusion. "I hope he has done nothing wrong, my good lady. I hope that you have not come here to bring me bad news about his well-being."

Macaria couldn't help but smile at the concern that Hypnos was showing for his (slightly older) twin brother. Even if the both of them were never around each other most of the time unlike other twins such Artemis and Apollo or Phobos and Deimos, it was still very clear that they still cared deeply for each other and worry for each other's well-beings. She should know, for she had listened to the way Thanatos had spoken so caringly about his twin.

"Be rest assured when I say that he has not done anything wrong and that he is fine," Macaria assured gently, glad to then see Hypnos release a sigh of relief. "But, I come here with the intention to discuss with you about your twin brother's past."

"His past?" Hypnos said in questioning confusion. "What would you wish to know about his past, your grace?"

Letting out a sigh, she admitted truthfully, "I know so little of it, Hypnos. It bothers me to realize that I don't actually know much of him as I thought I did."

Hypnos looked at the young princess thoughtfully, his eyes still alight with curiosity at her surprising request. "Have you asked him of it?" he asked.

"I can tell from his eyes when he implies it that it hurts him so to think about it," she replied, her eyes down-casted. "I don't want to press him because I don't want him to ponder on what pains him, but I would like very much to learn how he had been like from someone who was – and still is – close to him. I know that I may sound snoopy and may be prying uninvited into other people's lives, but as his partner, I really do wish to know."

Macaria brought her gaze up when she felt a gentle hand being placed on her shoulder. Hypnos looked at her with his gentle grey eyes, the side of his mouth quirking his lips into a kind half-smile.

"I'm touched that you would wish to do such a thing," he told her. "It just shows how much you love him and how you want to embrace him completely." And then, offering her his arm to take, he said, "Shall we have this conversation in my mansion?"

With a gracious smile, Macaria accepted his offered arm and allowed him to lead her across the poppies and into the cave where Lethe flowed, and inside there stood a quaint but beautiful mansion. Hypnos' dwelling had no doors and gates, for it was a preference of his to not have any creaking hinges to ruin the quiet and serene atmosphere that was perfect for slumber.

When Hypnos and Macaria entered, there was a petite young woman standing nearby, who had long strawberry blonde hair that fell in gentle curls to her waist and a pair of soft brown eyes, and there was a lovely smile on her face as she greeted the princess respectfully.

"Welcome to our humble abode, blessed Macaria."

Macaria bowed her head, greeting back just as kindly, "Thank you, Pasithea."

The young wife of Hypnos then excused herself to the kitchens, just as Hypnos and Macaria took their seats in the living area. As soon as they had made themselves comfortable, it was then he brought up their earlier discussion.

"How much would you like to know about my older brother's past, your grace?" he inquired of her, to which Macaria looked down at her intertwined fingers on her lap, swallowing an uncertain lump and letting out a sigh before spoke.

"He had mentioned that he had been a very lonely and unloved soul during his youth. He tells me that it's because others see him as only Death, so he knew not the love of others except yours and Nyx. Surely this is not true? I cannot imagine Thanatos not having the liking of others when he was younger. He is kind and good-hearted, so I cannot fathom the thought that he had been an outcast."

Hypnos then hummed in understanding, although it nearly sounded as though it was out of guilt as well. "So it is about the loneliness that had plagued him in the past," he murmured softly. "I will be truthful when I say that is true. Sometimes, when I myself recall the childhood and youth that I had while growing up with him, I cannot help but feel guilty of myself."

Macaria furrowed her eyebrows in confusion at the last bit. "Whatever do you mean by that, Hypnos?" she asked curiously. "Have you done something to him, might I ask?"

He sighed and shrugged as he replied, "Maybe it's just the fact that I had always been more welcomed by others than him."

The princess did not say a word, only continuing to look at him in confusion. Hypnos almost seemed hesitant to talk about what was on his mind then, but he couldn't keep anything away from his brother's lover, since she had sincerely wanted to learn of his past. Besides, she was still the princess, so he could not feel inclined to deny her anything.

"I will be very honest with whatever I am about to reveal to you, your grace."

"Alright."

"Thanatos and I have always been together, for most of our early lives. When Night brought us into this world, he had been the first to emerge, although he had been holding onto my hand when he did. We were always together all the time. We were not only twin brothers, but we were each other's best friend and companion. And out of this tight-knit bond, there is a connection that holds us together. A connection to be able to feel what the other is feeling."

A sigh left Hypnos then, and his voice took a more saddened and melancholic tone.

"Unfortunately, my role as the God of Sleep would later unintentionally awaken an envy within him."

"What? How so?" Macaria asked, astonished. She had never thought that Thanatos had been envious of his younger twin. All the times she had heard him speak of Hypnos, he would always speak of his younger twin greatly.

Hypnos then went on to explain.

"When we had come of age, we would roam among the mortals when our mother was out. They welcomed me with open arms, praying for me to enter into their homes and bless them with peacefully good sleep. I could not deny their prayers, and bless them all the best that I could. However, they also prayed that Death never be upon them, that they would awaken from their sleep the next day and be blessed to be alive and not have their souls taken away in their slumber. All of them feared Death, and they cursed it whenever the souls of their loved ones had departed. Thus, Thanatos was never welcomed by them as I had been."

Another sigh escaped his lips then, and he slid his eyes shut as his lips pursed into a thin line. But Macaria kept silent but attentive, allowing him time to speak. Internally, though, she felt upset by what Hypnos had told her about the resentful treatment that Thanatos had to face from the mortals. She had never realized that her lover had been hated before. Just the thought of it was enough to make her heart wrench.

Hypnos continued to speak, and she continued to listen.

"Thanatos never did voice out how much he hated being treated badly by the mortals; he was never one to complain about what bothered him. But the way he changed since then showed how he was very hurt by it, and so did his behavior towards me when we were around the mortals."

Clearing her throat politely before speaking, Macaria then asked, "Change in what way, Hypnos? How different was he from last time?"

"He was very different," he admitted to her. "When we were children, he could be seen laughing and smiling, and he and I would be so close that it might look like we would never be apart. But as he grew older and got affected by the mortals' hatred for him as Death, he became more mild-mannered yet reclusive, and he distanced himself from me as often as he could. He started to spend most of his time by himself, becoming a loner. Whenever I talked to him, he wouldn't be as open to me as he had been before. In simple terms; he slowly became very much like the aloof person he is now."

Hypnos chuckled then, but that chuckle sounded more melancholic than amused. Macaria also noticed a look in his eye that showed how much the thought of how Thanatos had been like in the past had bothered him. She felt sorry for him then, wondering how he managed to cope with it.

"It took quite a long while for my brother to start spending time with me again. I will admit to you that now, he is still not as he was in the past, and it's a norm for him now to distance himself from me – or others, for that matter – whenever he chose for it to be. But at least it's better than never having him around at all. Perhaps the loneliness he had put himself through had taken a toll on him. One could only be on their lonesome for so long, and everyone needs somebody to talk to at times."

"If you don't mind me asking," Macaria suddenly spoke up, breaking out of her silence, "if, other than you, Thanatos had been close to anyone else in particular?"

And it was then Pasithea emerged from the kitchen, in her hands a tray with two bronze chalices. Upon reaching the sitting area, she bowed her head respectfully as she held out the tray with the chalices of wine to Macaria in kind offer. The princess smiled and said a gracious 'thank you' as she took a chalice, and Pasithea then moved to serve her husband the other glass.

There was a loving smile on Hypnos' lips as he looked at his wife kindly in the eye and said a very gracious 'thank you' when he accepted the chalice she offered him. The kind smile that was already on Pasithea's lips widened as she listened to the way he said his thanks so sincerely, making clear that she loved the fact that her husband was sincerely doing so.

Macaria could not help but discretely watch them as she took a quiet sip of the sweet red wine. The love shared between Hypnos and Pasithea – both of them looked so very different from each other, considering the fact that he was of the Underworld while Pasithea used to be a resident on Mount Olympus – was evident in the way the little gestures between them was enough to make each other smile. That was a sign of a perfect marriage right there, where love was a strong factor in the relationship.

Macaria wondered if Thanatos had that sort of love with anyone else before.

But before she could delve even more into that new thought that had appeared in her mind, Pasithea had already made her way back into the kitchens, and Hypnos had resumed where their conversation had been left off.

"If there is any other person that Thanatos had been close to, your grace," he answered between polite sips of wine, "it would be none other than our mother, Nyx."


	4. Chapter 4

_**Recollections**_

A while later, Charon returned to fetch the princess, so Macaria had to finally end her visit and she thanked Hypnos and Pasithea for their kind hospitality and bade them farewell. But as she was about to step into the ferry, Hypnos stopped her.

"My lady, is it alright if I say something to you?"

"Of course, Hypnos. What is it?"

"First of all," he began, his tone thoughtful and emotional. "I want to thank you, for doing this."

Macaria became confused then, raising a brow in question as to what he had meant. Turning to face him, she inquired, "For doing what, Hypnos? I do not actually understand what you meant."

Hypnos was prompt in answering, knowing what he wanted to say already.

"For showing care towards my brother. Truly, in your name, he is blessed to have you."

Hypnos need not say anymore to have Macaria feeling more touched by the sentiment than she already was. To be honest, she did not think much of her doing this, only just the fact that she wanted to learn about Thanatos' past loneliness in order to somewhat understand him better. But she accepted Hypnos' appreciation nonetheless, touched that he would say such a thing.

"It is no problem, Hypnos," she replied with a smile. "And thank you too, for your help. It's been very enlightening to me."

Macaria then waved kindly goodbye to him as she stepped into the ferry and Charon began to row off. Hypnos stood on the shores of poppy for a little while, waving back and watching her leave, until he finally turned away and returned to his cave quietly.

"Back to the palace, your grace?" Charon asked, glancing at the princess for a short while before putting his eyes back on the path ahead of them.

"No," Macaria replied, to which he was surprised.

"Then where to now?"

"I wish to go to the Aboveworld."

XXX

Climbing up the long steps that had been carved out of the rock walls of the Underworld centuries ago, and getting past Cerberus (to which she greeted the resident hellhound with some head rubbing and scratching each of the three heads' ears, to which he nuzzled his head against her in friendly appreciation), she walked out into the dark and icy land that was the Aboveworld currently.

She stayed at the mouth of the cave that she had emerged from, for she was hesitant to travel out into the land on her own, to which she could only see whiteness stretching for miles across the horizon. Sometimes, she truly wondered how the winter had first been like when her grandmother created it, but her grandmother was not the most important thing on her mind right now.

"Great Nyx! Mistress of the Night! The lady who hides in the shadows! Offspring of Chaos itself!" she called out loud to the air, her eyes fixed on the dark blue sky adorned with a few dark purple clouds and an abundance of glittering stars scattered all around. "Hear me! I ask of you to grace me with a few minutes of your time! I wish to speak to you! Me, who is the lover of Thanatos, your son!"

Not a word was spoken in response to her call, but Macaria could clearly feel a changing shift in the cold air around her. She neither saw nor heard anything that was out of the ordinary, but she could feel it, her supernaturally heightened senses picking up something of sort of a change. But she remained calm, patiently waiting for anything to happen.

"You have called, and so I answer."

The sweet voice of a woman sounded from behind, causing her to turn out instantly. Her sights immediately fell upon a goddess who had pale skin that was akin to the color of a shining moon, really dark blue-purple hair – almost looking black – that flowed smoothly down to the back of her knees, and eyes that was the color of her hair but with silver pupils, which made Macaria think of two twinkling silver stars in the night sky. In stark contrast to her pure white skin but matching her dark hair and eyes, she wore flowing robes of dark midnight blue and black, making her look almost like a shadow.

The young goddess has heard the stories told of Nyx, one of the primordial beings of the universe and the personification of Night. Although there really were not many tales of her, Nyx was said to always linger in the shadows of the world and was only seen very rarely in glimpses, but she was reputed to be of exceptional power and beauty.

But now that Macaria was face-to-face with the great ancient goddess herself, seeing her before her very own eyes, the tales of her beauty certainly spoke true. She has never seen such an image of dark beauty before. But not only was Nyx beautiful, she seemed to completely represent the Night that was her creation, even looking like a part of it herself.

Only after a few seconds of gazing at her in surprise and awe, Macaria finally bowed down in utmost respect, because of two reasons.

First was because Nyx was a primordial being and an individual that was even more powerful than Zeus himself, so her position was even higher than Macaria's title as a goddess-princess.

Second was, very most importantly, because Nyx was Macaria's lover's _mother_.

"Lady Nyx, it is a great honor to meet you," Macaria greeted politely and kindly. "My name is Macaria, the eldest child of Hades and Persephone of the Underworld."

Nyx kept her enchanting eyes on the young goddess as she smiled in response. "I know very well of whom you are, Princess Macaria," she replied, her answer causing Macaria to look up in surprise.

"You do? How?" Macaria questioned.

Nyx's smile turned bigger and she replied, "Thanatos has spoken many good things about you, my dear."

"He has?" Macaria questioned, her voice clear of her surprise at hearing that. "He speaks about me to you?"

Nyx giggled, as if she had heard an amusing joke. "Well, of course! As his mother, I would very much like to know about his partner – both in his field of work and his love life."

Macaria blushed then, suddenly overwhelmed by the feeling of bashfulness at hearing that from her lover's mother. She went shy at the thought that Nyx had actually wanted to know about her from Thanatos, but it also made her curious as to what he had told her.

"Now, my dear. You have said you had wished to speak with me," Nyx remarked. "What is it that you wish to speak with me about?"

Macaria then snapped to attention, remembering fully what had been her intentions for coming up to the Aboveworld and seeking out Nyx in the first place. "I wish to ask you about Thanatos," she told the older goddess. "About his past."

"What about his past?"

"The loneliness he had faced when he was younger. I had gone to Hypnos about it, and he told me that the next best person to ask about it was you, his mother."

At that, Nyx smile faltered slightly, and her beautiful enchanting eyes turned melancholic, no doubt because she was thinking about the sad thoughts of the past. Macaria suddenly felt a sharp pang at the sight of the ancient goddess becoming solemn as she thought about her son, but kept quiet in respect, wanting to give her the time to answer.

"My dear Thanatos. Loneliness had always seemed to be a constant part of him since his early childhood. He may not have noticed it, but I did. I saw the way many others choose to ignore him, for he was very much different from all of them, and they simply did not want to go anywhere near him because of that. Seeing that happening to my child had saddened me immensely, and I wanted to do anything I could to stop him from succumbing into this loneliness, because no mother would ever want their child to be alone, wouldn't they?"

"No," Macaria answered in understanding. "Of course not."

"I, as his mother, wanted to give him a comfortable childhood, away from the harshness of reality that awaited him, so I did just that. I kept him under my care most of the time, with him always being at ease with the dark shadows of the night that were created by his father, Erebus. Giving him my company and attention, with Hypnos being there with him all the time, it managed to keep Thanatos happy. That was, until everything had to change."

"And it changed because…" Macaria asked, drawling out at the end because she was unsure of what reasoning she could provide.

But Nyx provided her that reasoning promptly, replying with another melancholic sigh of breath, "Because I knew very well that he had to grow up eventually and become independent, so I let him go when he had asked for it."

Silence ensured for a while after that, with Nyx deciding to take a seat on some clean flat stones nearby. She patted the space next to her, her eyes asking Macaria silently to join her. The young goddess did so without hesitation, sitting down next to her on the flat stone. The silence stretched on for a little while more after that, until Nyx finally broke it.

"It was painful for him to finally discover and realize how very much hated he had been by the mortals, and it also opened his eyes to the fact that he had been shunned by some of his daimon siblings. And seeing Hypnos, his twin brother who he considered his best friend and was inseparable from, being more welcomed than he was, he felt that it was unfair, of course."

"Who would not?" Macaria added thoughtfully, feeling pained on the inside. "But what did you do then? And what did he do, when he realized all of that?"

Nyx looked at Macaria then, and the princess could not help but be entranced by the primordial goddess' mystical eyes. Her silver pupils really did look like two shining stars against the backdrop of the color of the night sky that were her irises. In her eyes, the beauty of the Night lay. And although Nyx looked quite middle-aged, maybe slightly younger, her eyes showed the truth of how truly ancient she was.

With a slight tilt at the corner of her lips to form a half-smile, Nyx answered, "I wanted very much to keep Thanatos safe, to keep him in his father's darkness that comes with my Night, but I knew that I could not shelter him forever, and I could only encourage him to be strong. He too had come to terms with the truth, and had learnt to live with it. I feel proud of him for doing so, although it still pained me to see how much it was hurting him deep inside. It pained me even more when he started parting from Hypnos, but I could not force him to not do that." And then, taking a quiet inhale and exhale of breath, she added, "As for Thanatos, he found his calling in working for your father. And thankfully, he had achieved solace in that."

Hearing that, Macaria's eyes widened in surprise, clearly not expecting the sudden inclusion of her father in this conversation. "What has my father got anything to do with him finding solace?" she asked in sincere curiosity.

"Your father," Nyx began, a thoughtful look in her eyes as she spoke, "was the first person – other than Hypnos, myself and Erebus – to not shun Thanatos for being Death. My son had admittedly been wary of him, but even I could understand. Hades was one of the original six Olympians who had successfully overthrew the Titans in the Great Divine War –the Titanomachy – that occurred on Earth for ten years, a clear show of how powerful he was. When he took rule of the Underworld and became its first – and only – king, Thanatos was not sure of the kind of monarch he would be, but hoped that he would not be a tyrant like his father, Cronus."

"And then?"

"Needless to say, Hades did not treat him like a servant from the moment they first met each other. Rather, he was friendly. He talked to him politely and even took time to know about his history, for he had given reason that a king should take the time to acquaintance themselves with the members of their court. Thanatos had – understandably – been wary of this sort of treatment at first; who would not, after being hated and outcasted by others for so long?"

Macaria nodded her head silently in response, wondering to herself about how her father had been like with Thanatos when they had first met. Unlike the (stupid) common tales that Hades was evil and ruthless, her father was truly a kind and good-hearted god. He was fair to all and treated everyone as equals. He even treated the close members of his court as his friends, as seen in the way he held conversations with Hecate, Charon and, of course, Thanatos.

In the meanwhile, Nyx was continuing on with her recollections of the past.

"But as time went by, Thanatos began to slowly become at ease with the king. He found himself finally opening up to someone else, other than his twin and his mother. He found himself finally having someone else that he could consider as a friend; someone who was kind to him, who paid no care to the fact that he was Death, and who did not turn him away like everyone else had done. With that, he swore complete allegiance to the Underworld God-King, and he had been Hades' loyal minister ever since."

When Nyx ended her tale, Macaria's eyes went to look up at the dark blue backdrop up above with the many stars that sparkled like diamonds in silver light. As she did, she thought to herself about Thanatos and his past loneliness once again; about how it had pained him, about how it had strained his relationship with his twin brother, about how he had to endure the unfair hate, and about how her father had managed to give him the companionship he wanted in the end.

But then, she thought to herself about whether there had been anyone else – instead of her father – to give him that said companionship?

"Had there ever been someone else?" she suddenly asked out of the blue.

She turned to look at Nyx, who was looking at her with genuine cluelessness in her mystical gaze. Macaria hesitated continuing then, worried that her question might sound very stupid. However, she knew that she wanted to know, and it's either now or never for her to get that answer.

"Had there ever been someone else in Thanatos' life, before he met my father? A friend? An acquaintance? A… A…" the last word came out in a quiet murmur under her breath, "… lover?"

All of a sudden, Macaria felt something sort of flame erupt within her heart at the possibility that Thanatos may have been with someone else before her. The thought of another woman having his love and affection made her grimace internally, and she can't help but wonder that if there had been such a woman, how had he been like with her? Had he been happy? Had he been pleased? Had she given him… _everything_?

It would be quite hurtful to know if he ever had a woman who had given him her all. The young princess thought to herself about the fact that she wanted to give him her _everything_. She loved him so much, and they had been together for a few mortal decades now (which seemed more fleeting in her eyes). She had thought this through so many times, but had always shied away at the thought. But she knew that, in just a matter of time, she would be ready, and she would finally give her body and soul to him.

She was not ignorant of the supposed pleasures of the flesh in sexual intercourse – having relatives such as Aphrodite and Zeus made it very impossible to be ignorant of it. While she would shy at the topic, she felt a desire to experience it one day. But she, unlike Aphrodite or Zeus, did not want to simply give away her virginity to others as if she was throwing bread at hungry people. She knew of the sanctity of love during sexual intercourse, and had been taught by her mother to only give her maidenhood to the one she knew she was very much in love with, with him also loving her in return. And with that in mind, she knew that her maidenhead would belong to Thanatos, in the time to come.

But what if Thanatos had already experienced those said pleasures of the flesh?

She was suddenly torn out of her thoughts when she felt a soft hand cupping her cheek. Snapping her attentions back to the present, she realized that Nyx was looking at her with a kind, motherly gaze in her eyes. Her womanly lips were in a soft and warm smile full of understanding.

"My dear, there is no need for you to be jealous," Nyx said musingly. "Trust me when I tell you that, throughout his entire life, no woman have caught Thanatos' affections like you have."

"Truly?"

"Truly, dear child. And maybe it's also because that, while the others ran away at the very sight or sound of him, you stayed and brought yourself closer to him. You were willing to make him a part of your life, and so he made you a part of his. Anyone who was willing to stay in my son's life, despite his role as Death, are deserving of his affections."

And then, taking both of the princess' hands in hers, Nyx told her, "Trust me when I say that, with all honesty that I am capable of, Thanatos is truly in love with you."

"As am I with him," Macaria replied, smiling.

* * *

**Author's Note:**

Hello guys! As some of you would know, I'm in Malaysia right now on a relatives' visit. I'm probably going to be here until Wednesday, so I thought I would update this fic - might as well. It's a good thing I uploaded this chapter onto my account before I left home.

So expect the next chapter to come out some time soon, if not later! Ciao!

_Muse of Fanfiction_


	5. Chapter 5

_**Understandings**_

"Can I ask you something, Macaria?"

Looking up from the ground to the goddess, Macaria replied, "Anything, Lady Nyx. Anything you wish to ask, I will answer."

Nyx nodded her head once, and then asked, "Why are you doing this?"

Macaria only responded with a blank look, which prompted the Night deity to continue on with, "Why do you wish to know of my son's past? Should it not be that whatever happened in the past stayed in the past, and that only the present and the future are what would be more of concern? What reason do you have to want to learn of Thanatos' loneliness?"

Exhaling a sigh, Macaria looked down at her hands on her lap. There was a look of deep thought in her warm orange eyes, and it was easily readable on her face that she was thinking over her answer. With quiet patience, Nyx waited, keeping her eyes on her. And it had not taken long for Macaria to reply. The words flowed out of her mouth smoothly and surely, indicating the fact that she had already known the answer to Nyx's question before ever saying it.

"I understand very well that what I am doing right now can be considered 'snooping', and believe me when I say that I don't really mean to pry on his past; just the thought that I'm kind of actually doing that makes me feel ashamed. But I don't want to ask him directly, because I could tell from the look in his eyes when he remembers it that it hurts him so much. I want to know how bad his loneliness had been until it could still pain him until now, but I dared not have him recall his hurtful past. But now that I have been enlightened on everything, I know now that I would not allow such a thing like that to ever happen to him again."

Once again looking up at the eyes of her lover's mother, she gently said, "I fully embrace him for his past – no matter who he is or what had happened to him – because I love him, Lady Nyx. I love him with all of my heart, and I know that he is the one that I want to be with for all eternity. No matter what happens to the both of us, I will make sure that I will never leave him alone."

Nyx looked at her with her mystical eyes that seemed show emotions hidden under them. No matter how long she gazed into those eyes, Macaria could not see what the older goddess was thinking at this moment, but she could only hope for good things to what she had told her. Whatever she had uttered from her lips were indeed sincere and came from the bottom of her heart, and she could only hope that her lover's mother would indeed see reason in them.

All of a sudden, the primordial being suddenly cupped Macaria's face gently in her soft and smooth hands. Macaria stilled, but had her sights remain on Nyx's smile, which then directed to the smile that had started forming on the older goddess' lips.

"I assure you that Thanatos would never be alone ever again, because he has you," she told the princess affectionately. "You have a kind and loving heart, Macaria. Your willingness to embrace his past has shown me how truly good a soul you are. Such a person who are willing to be with Thanatos – no matter who the Fates have made him to be – are completely deserving of his love."

Then taking her hands away from Macaria's cheeks to hold her hands instead, she told her, "And it pleases me greatly to know that you are the one who he has been fated to be with. There is no one else who is more perfect for him than you are, dear child. And I hope with all my heart that the both of you will be happy together until the impossible end of eternity."

Macaria could somewhat feel tears at Nyx's words, feeling absolutely touched and honored that she would say such a thing. She cherished those words greatly, treasuring it to her heart with utmost graciousness. She felt her heart soar at the thought that someone as great as Nyx would actually praise her with such high honors, and for the fact that she had wished her eternal happiness with Thanatos.

"Thank you so very much, Lady Nyx," she answered in a quiet whisper.

Nyx shook her head, the smile still on her lips. "No, my dear. Thank you."

* * *

In the royal private study, Hades and Persephone were sitting together by the hearth, both of them reading from old scrolls during this leisure time with each other. It was absolutely quiet in the room, save for the crackling of the fire in the hearth, and it had been that way for quite a long while. But Hades and Persephone did not mind. They were those sorts of couples who were content with quiet serenity between them, since both felt at peace and ease with each other. As they were reading, his hand was gently holding onto hers in between their own seats, periodically caressing the pad of his thumb on her soft and smooth skin. Occasionally, he would bring her hand to his lips to gently kiss her knuckles, to which it would make her look up at him and smile, and make him smile back in return.

But suddenly, their moment of quiet privacy as interrupted by sudden but gentle knocking on the door. "Come in," Hades called out in response, his eyes not leaving the scroll and his hand still holding onto his wife's.

The door creaked open slowly, and it then followed by the quiet familiar voice of their eldest daughter saying, "Father? Mother? May I have a moment with you?"

Looking away from the scroll in her hand and turning her head to face her daughter, Persephone replied with her signature gentle smile, "Of course you may, my dear. Is anything on your mind, or have you just come to spend some time with us?"

"Actually, there is something on my mind," Macaria admitted, quietly closing the door behind her. "There is something I wish to ask of the both of you."

Coming to where they were, she took a seat on the floor in front of her parents, sitting a safe distance away from the fires in the hearth. This had been a habit of hers since she was small, and she would gaze up at them as though they were two of the most marvelous beings in existence. Even in her current young adulthood, the habit still stuck to her, and she still gazed up at them with admiration because she knew that, to her, they were indeed two of the most marvelous beings in existence.

"Dear daughter, I can see in your eyes that something troubles you," Hades pointed out knowingly, leaning forward to cup her chin gently in his hand. "What is it?"

"Nothing troubles me, Father," she reassured Hades with a small smile. "It's just that I have been thinking about a lot of things today."

"Thinking of what?" Persephone asked curiously.

Macaria sighed a big breath that she seemed to have been holding in for quite some time, and her eyes became downcast to look at her hands in her lap. She twiddled her thumbs as she carefully thought about what she was about to say. In the meanwhile, Hades and Persephone kept quiet, waiting patiently for her to speak.

"I had actually spent most of my time just a few hours ago visiting Thanatos' family. I ferried to the river Lethe to speak with Hypnos at his cave, and I surfaced to the Aboveworld to meet Nyx."

"Why?" Hades asked, eyes looking genuinely curious.

"Well, it has something to do with his past," Macaria admitted truthfully. "You see, I had only recently found out about the fact that his past had been one plagued of loneliness, and I could tell that this loneliness must have had affected him so deeply and painfully. I would have asked him there and then, but I did not want to risk having him be plagued by memories that pained him. So instead, I asked his twin and his mother."

"And what did you learn?" Persephone asked politely, eyes too looking genuinely curious.

A few seconds pause, and the young princess then replied, "From their perspective, I have gotten a clear understanding of how life had been so very difficult for him when he was younger. It was such a sad tale. Being hated and outcasted just for being who you are, until to the point where you can never get accepted for just being you? No one should ever be subjected to such unfair treatment, especially such a good and kind-hearted soul."

"No one should indeed," Hades breathed knowingly, causing Persephone to look at him with concerned eyes.

Macaria asked quietly and meekly under her breath, "Is it alright if I ask you something?"

"What is it?" he questioned.

"But please do not be angry at what I am about to ask," his daughter added, sounding more hesitant by the second. "I have no intention to make the both of you angry."

Hades and Persephone glanced at each other with a glint of curiosity in their eyes, definitely at how slightly ominous their daughter's words were. But their response had been quick when Persephone replied, "What is it, sweet flower?"

With just a deep exhale of breath, Macaria asked, "Mother, how did you deal with this when you first married Father?"

The eyes of both parents widened in shock and surprise at what their daughter had just said.

It was no secret to the royal children as to how their parents' marriage had come to be. Hades and Persephone had no intention to keep any secrets from their children, so they had told all of them of the story when the three of them were at the right age. Needless to say, all three of them were shocked, unable to believe at first that their father had actually kidnapped their mother and married her, instead of courting her properly as how it should have been done. And needless to say, Hades had been terrified of telling the truth, worried that it would make his children hate him for what he had done to their mother; it was something he was not proud of, but also something that he cannot deny he had done.

But in the end, it had done nothing to damage the relationship between them. Macaria, Melinoa and Zagreus had clarified the fact that they were indeed surprised at what had been enlightened to them, but said that it did not change the way they see their parents; they did not view their father as a ruthless abductor, nor did they view their mother as a naïve and tricked prisoner. When understandings were given along with the fact that Persephone had let bygones be bygones so long ago, the matter was not brought up anymore.

Well, until now, and this had both Hades and Persephone thinking. Unbeknownst to Macaria, her words – clearly intended to be about Thanatos – could also reflect her father's life during his earlier years.

During those years when he first gained rule of the Underworld and became the King of the Dead, Hades had been a very misjudged individual, for no one could see reason why he would ever accept rule of the seemingly terrifying underground. Many from up above had thought that he had some morbid fascination with deceased souls and Death, so many have taught themselves to be very wary of him and the kingdom he ruled. Many of them had shaped him to be a figure of absolute fear and darkness, merciless and cold-hearted to the point where he was depicted as a monster capable of torture.

For decades, Hades had lived with that image, even though he knew very well that it was not the truth about him. The only reason he did not try to change that was because he found it a waste of his time to try to deal with foolish people, and thus did not even give a single damn to whatever they had said about him. So long he had been viewed as such from those of the Aboveworld that it seemed as though he was destined to live with that image for all eternity.

But most fortunately, one had managed to gradually see past that fake and wrong image of him and came to love him for who he truly was, and that woman was now his wife, queen, and the mother of his children.

Persephone only gave him a small smile that was full of her love and her affection, while she answered in reply to their daughter's question, "Well, my dear. I will admit to you that it had been quite difficult for me at first. In fact, I hadn't a single clue as to what to do! But…"

"But?" Macaria inquired, orange eyes curious.

"But it was _love_ that prevailed in the end," Hades finished solemnly, accompanied by a nod of agreement from Persephone. "The love that your mother and I had for each other was what kept us together."

And then, leaning forward to once again cup his beloved daughter's face tenderly in his hands, he told her with a knowing smile, "And the love you hold for Thanatos will surely strive, no matter what."


	6. Chapter 6

**_Conversation_**

The old man was at lake, sitting atop a rock and gazing out into the distance. He had been by his lonesome, for what seem to be quite a while. But then suddenly, a little girl came to him, a small daisy in her hand and a big grin on her face. Without a word, she held up the daisy to him, clearly as an offering, with her smile saying silent kind words. There was a look of surprise in the old man's eyes, clearly not expecting something like this at all. This was followed by a look neutrality, which may mean that he was silently trying to register what was happening.

But then it disappeared when a small smile took form on his lips, his eyes even showing how very much touched he was by the gesture. With gentle hands, he accepted the flower, his face showing the thanks he had for the sweet little girl. The little girl smiled even wider, before climbing up the rock to sit next to the old man on the small bit of space left. He clearly welcomed her company, his smile still present on his wrinkled face.

Macaria realized that this was the first time she had seen the old man being happy, instead of how heavily saddened he seemed to be from the moment she had first laid eyes on him. The look caused her to be taken aback, halting her walk and standing still, looking in awe at the sight of the smiling old man. But seeing that sort of change in personality in him actually had her smiling, glad to see something good happen in her good mood.

She was in a good mood after leaving the study, since her heart-to-heart talk with her parents had left her in good spirits. Hades and Persephone had been good help to solve her qualms, listening to her attentively as she spoke of her situation before giving advice in the best way that they could. Now, she was sure that she would be able to handle this in her own hands.

Her attentions went back to the present, first looking at the old man and the little girl again – both who seemed to be in a chatty conversation, all whilst he twirled the daisy gently between his fingers – before looking to the pale orange sky that signified evening in the Elysian Fields, which would slowly become full of the misty dark blue that was coming from beyond the horizon. But finally, it went to the main point of her focus.

Nearby on a cliff, Thanatos stood still near the edge, looking out into the horizon. From her vantage point, Macaria had a feeling that he too was watching the scene between the old man and the little girl, for the direction of his gaze seemed to be on them, only fleetingly looking away for just a few seconds every now and then. He seemed to have not noticed Macaria nearby.

And he still did not notice until she had climbed that hill, approaching him slowly but carefully. He finally realized that she was there until she was only a few steps away, to which he then turned his head to look at her with somewhat surprised but relieved eyes.

"You're here!" he exclaimed in an exhale of breath, rushing to meet her halfway and take a hold of her hands. "I've been looking for you everywhere. I didn't know where you were. I was worried."

A genuine smile played on Macaria's lips then, feeling somewhat flattered that he had been worried when he could not find her; a clear show of the care he had for her. But still, she felt guilty for making him worried in the first place, and even more so at the thought of why she had herself be missing from him.

"I was out to visit two people," she told him, releasing one of his hands and using the other to pull him gently to walk with her. "To discuss some things."

This immediately had Thanatos curious, judging by the way he furrowed his brows and looked at her in confusion. "Visit who?" he asked. "And discuss what?"

Despite how the words she was about to say was feeling heavy on her tongue, she knew that there was no point in lying to him about what she had done. He needed to know, so that was a good enough reason to not hold back the truth. Besides, they had promised to be truthful to each other in their relationship, so she intended to keep her part of the promise.

With a deep breath, she answered softly, "I went to visit Hypnos and Nyx, to talk about you."

This had Thanatos suddenly stop walking, only standing still on the ground he was on, his brows frowning and his eyes narrowed to look at her with even more confusion, with a hint of disbelief. This caused Macaria to stop as well, turning to face him fully and look at him back in the eye. Their hands were still held together, while their gazes became locked on each other.

In a gentle, questioning voice, he said, "You went to my brother and mother to talk about _me_?"

Macaria nodded once in affirmation, her notion calm. She could only watch as her lover became even more overwhelmed in confusion, as well as worry.

"What did you learn?" he asked under his breath.

"How lonely you had been in the past."

Thanatos downcasted his gaze to the ground, almost in a manner akin to being ashamed. Although still remaining calm and quiet, Macaria could feel her heart starting to become slightly more heavy, afraid that she may have upset him.

But by no means was she going to back down from this conversation. With a steady breath, she used both hands to grasp his hand that was already linked to one of hers, holding it gently as she came forward to him. He still did not look up at her, but he did ask, "Why would you do such a thing?"

His tone of voice was not one that was angered or betrayed. Instead, it was just a voice of simple questioning, truly wanting to know why she had done what she had done just because it mattered somewhat to him as well.

At this point, Macaria resumed walking, leading him by the hand that she was grasping. Thanatos followed willingly, his gaze once again back up to look at her.

"Why would you want to know about the loneliness of my past?" he asked once again, his voice still neutral but questioning. "Could you not have asked me?"

Macaria had known very well beforehand that he was bound to ask her a sort of question, as it was the highly most logical thing he would ask. So, she had an answer already prepared. "From the very moment you had mentioned it, it was already made clear in your eyes that you would not want to relive such a painful memory. Am I not right, dear heart?"

Thanatos was stilled by her answer, but it was already obvious that it was indeed the truth. He continued to gaze at her quietly, his questioning eyes searching. Macaria could tell that he was trying to draw some sort of answer from looking at her, but he was coming up with nothing. So, giving him the benefit of the doubt, she decided to come completely clean to him right there and then, wanting him to know why she had done what she did.

"Come, dear heart. Let us take a seat, and I will tell you everything."

Thanatos followed her as she walked into a nearby cluster of trees, continuing to walk into it until they had come to a small clearing. Macaria always had this strange ability to find a sizable resting space among trees; something that he suspected she had inherited from her mother. This particular clearing was covered by the trees surrounding it, making them unable to be seen from anyone on the outside. She took a seat down under a tree, patting down the space on the grass next to her. He willingly sat down right next to her, their sides touching.

"So you will not mind explaining to me what exactly you talked to them about?" he asked quietly, not really looking at her but at the grass.

Setting her own gaze on her twiddling thumbs, she kept quiet to herself in order for her to think over what she was going to say. "I went to your brother first, since he was the closest to you," she began, slowly but surely. "Hypnos first told me of how close the both of you had been when you were young; to the point where you two were nearly inseparable."

"That we were," Thanatos agreed easily.

Her lips tilted into a small for short second, before disappearing as she said seriously, "But he also told me of how you changed when you first discovered what the mortals truly felt about you, and how it had changed your relationship with him."

He stilled so suddenly, and she could hear his breathing stop in this moment. But nonetheless, she continued on, wanting to get it all out there and then.

"He told me of how you began to lose the happiness that you had as a child, and of how you distanced yourself from him because you thought that it was not fair that you were not treated as fairly as your twin. He explained to me that you began to keep to yourself, and was that to save yourself the hurt from the unfairness?"

Thanatos still said nothing, but he gave a small nod. Macaria could tell from the gesture that he was beginning to remember those painful days, and it was hurting him so.

"Nyx had been enlightening as well. My meeting with your mother had went smoothly, if I may say so myself; she was kind and polite. And I can tell that she held so much love for you in her heart, especially when she began to recall how much she had wanted to shelter you from the cruel reality that you had faced. Trust me when I say that she had spoken of so much yearn to keep you under her care and protect you, but she was knowledgeable in letting you grow on your own and become strong against that unfair hatred. It's because of what she did that you manage to grow into the unbiased and fair sort of person that you are."

Thanatos still said nothing, not even now that Macaria has finally finished talking. She did not know of what else to say, because she wanted him to speak and tell her everything that was on his mind. He was just keeping to himself, letting those bothered thoughts simmer in his mind, not expressing them and making him feel more bothered with each passing second. But she did not want that to be so. She wanted him to tell her everything that he was feeling, to let her in on his thoughts, in order for her to understand better. But she needed to push him slightly in order for her to do that.

"What had it been like?" she asked innocently. "How did you feel?"

It had been sooner than she had expected that he answered. And there was a lot more emotion in his voice than she would have expected; such raw emotion that immediately gave away the hurt that was inside his heart.

"It was painful. To think that I was hated so very much just because of what I am. I mean, it was not my fault that the Fates' had chosen me to become Death, right? I had never asked for it. I had never asked to be the one thing that mortals hated the most. Would I have chosen it if it had been my choice?"

His voice had been rising up in what might be anger – an emotion that Macaria had rarely seen him express – and the expression on his face showed that he could just have an outburst quite soon. But before that could even attempt to happen, his face suddenly calmed again, although there was a hint of sadness lying within his features.

"But nonetheless, I knew better than to question the mighty sisters of destiny. They had chosen this path of life for me, and I have no other option but to follow it. Even if the consequences of that choice would be very harsh to me, I have to accept it anyway."

And then, turning to Macaria, he told her solemnly, "You don't have to concern yourself with the unfortunate events of my past, sweet Macaria. What was done has been done, and there will be nothing I can do to stop it. It's nothing now."

However, those last three words he uttered had suddenly, and unexpectedly, made Macaria snap.

"It's _not _nothing!"

Thanatos jumped at the sudden increase in her volume, which was something he especially did not expect of her to do. But before he could even try to settle her down, Macaria was then fuming.

"You were hurt from the loneliness you were forced to endure, and all for the silly reason that you were made to be Death. Death is a natural aspect of the lives of mortals! Mortals were not meant to live forever, and every single one of them will depart from the world at one point of time or another! Why can't they accept that?! They should not hate you for what you are! They don't even know who you truly are!"

Her hands were clenched tightly into fists and her orange eyes seemed to start burning like true fire. This worried Thanatos immensely, for he has never seen Macaria like this before, since she was usually so gentle. But now, seeing her rage at his expense, it opened his eyes to what was more to her than met his eyes.

"You tell me to not concern myself with it, but how can I not when it was something that had caused you great pain?! To think that you had to go through that is terrible, Thanatos! It makes me question why the Fates had to weave such an event into your thread when you had done nothing wrong to deserve it! I hated the unfairness of it all when I learnt how it had hurt you so much! I hate the thought of you suffering!"

Macaria then finally stopped raging at that moment, taking in deep breaths to calm her racing heart. In the meanwhile, Thanatos had been quiet throughout, just staring at her with wide eyes as she had expressed her thoughts on the matter. His face was completely of neutral blankness, his thoughts unreadable in his eyes.

But he broke that silence when he suddenly asked, "Why does it bother you so much?"

Macaria looked at him in shock, and she seemed almost outraged at how blatantly he had just asked her that, even though she had just expressed so much anger just seconds before. She wondered for a short second if he had even heard her properly, or if he had not paid her any attention at all in the past few seconds.

But then, upon seeing how serious he was, she found herself actually thinking about why she was so bothered by it. Yes, she was upset that her lover had to go through such hardships, but why was she truly bothered by it?

Surprisingly, the answer came to her much quicker than she had expected.


End file.
